What to do instead of screens: 25 ideas
By Adam Linmore · October 30, 2026
Most parents do not hand a toddler the phone because they think it is a great idea. They reach for it because they need four minutes to drain the pasta, finish a call or get through a line at the pharmacy. In many houses the screen is doing three jobs: it keeps a toddler still while a parent cooks, it keeps her company when the parent is too tired to be company, and it promises, on the box, to be teaching her something. Whatever takes its place has to do those jobs, or the screen will be back within the week.
So this list is organized by those moments, with swaps that work for one- to three-year-olds. None needs a trip to the store. An adult stays close for all of them, within arm’s reach of any water, and nothing small enough to choke on (anything that fits through a toilet-paper tube) goes to a child under three or any child who still puts things in her mouth.
When you are cooking
The toddler cupboard. One low cupboard of plastic bowls, lids, wooden spoons and a colander. Change what is in it every week.
Wash the potatoes. A small tub of water, a few whole potatoes and a cloth, with her beside you.
Narrate like a cooking show. “Now I’m stirring. Stir, stir, stir! Now it’s bubbling!” Her job is to say “Stir!” back.
Kitchen band. A pot and a wooden spoon. Loud, yes. Also joyful.
A real job. Tearing lettuce, pouring water from a small pitcher, carrying the napkins. It is slower with her than without her, which is the point: the hour the screen used to fill was an hour she could spend in the middle of things.
When you are on the phone
The only-when-I’m-busy basket. A small basket she sees only during calls: a sturdy board book, a chunky puzzle, a soft toy.
Scribble station. Tape a big sheet of paper to the table or floor and offer one chunky crayon, with you nearby.
Posting box. Cut a slot in a shoebox lid and let her post old playing cards.
Laundry helper. Socks into the basket, or clothes out of the dryer.
When you are out: errands, waiting rooms, restaurants
The bag. Pack it the way you pack diapers: two books, a toy car, crayons and paper, a snack. It goes everywhere the tablet used to go.
I spy colors. “I see something red!” She points. No right answers needed.
Songs with hand motions. The quiet version works almost anywhere.
The restaurant routine. Order as soon as you sit down, sit where she can see the kitchen, let her hold the menu, a spoon or the sugar packets, and name what happens in the room. Leave before dessert if you have to.
Guess which hand. Hide a sock or a toy car in one hand or behind your back.
Name what passes. In the car or the stroller: bus, dog, big truck, red light.
When everyone needs to move
Box tunnel. Open both ends of a big cardboard box.
Couch-cushion path. Cushions on the floor to climb over, with you spotting.
Animal walks. Stomp like an elephant, hop like a bunny, tiptoe like a mouse.
Ball roll. Sit facing each other with legs apart and roll a soft ball back and forth. Say “Ready… set…” and wait for her to say “Go!”
Outside, in any weather. Puddles, leaves, sticks, snow, dressed for it. The World Health Organization asks for at least three hours of physical activity a day, spread through the day, from one to four, and outdoors is the easiest place to find them.
When it is time to wind down
Read together. Let her turn the pages, point and “read” to you. Picture books use more different and rarer words than everyday talk. The same few books, over and over, is fine; the fortieth reading is the one where she says the next word before you do.
Bath-time story. Tell a simple story about her day while you wash her hair.
The same order every night. Bath, book, song, dark. In a study of more than 10,000 mothers in fourteen countries, children with a consistent bedtime routine fell asleep earlier and faster, woke less and slept longer.
A photo album on paper. “Who’s that? That’s Grandpa!”
Cuddle and count. Toes, fingers or stars on the ceiling.
The idea behind all 25
Notice what they have in common: a grown-up nearby, a bit of talking and a toddler doing something with her hands or body. That is the mechanism the research keeps naming. A baby learns to talk by taking turns with a person who answers, and a screen cannot answer.
The guidelines point the same way. The World Health Organization advises no screen time at one year and no more than an hour a day from two to four, with less being better. The American Academy of Pediatrics’ 2016 guidance advised none under eighteen months except video calls, and its 2018 statement, “The Power of Play,” asked pediatricians to tell families that time on the floor is not wasted.
An Australian study that recorded whole days at home found that at three years, each minute of screen time went with about seven fewer adult words. At the study’s average of 172 minutes a day, that came to a projected 1,139 fewer adult words, 843 fewer child vocalizations and 194 fewer back-and-forth turns a day. That is an association, not proof that the screen caused the difference, but the small conversations in the ideas above are exactly what it counted.
What this does not mean
A screen on a long flight or a sick day on the couch is not a failure. Families have hard days. The book behind this site suggests naming those exceptions out loud, so they stay exceptions, and putting the screen back in its one spot when they end. What does not work is the vague allowance, “sometimes, when it’s hard,” which a two-year-old will test at every hard moment.
Three tips that make the swaps work
Replace before you remove. Put the cooking basket out before you start cooking, and keep the screen out of sight, not just off.
Start with your hardest moment. If dinner is the pinch point, begin there.
Expect a few loud days. Protests usually last three to five days and are often louder on the second day than the first. Keep to the plan kindly and briefly, and do not negotiate minutes.
When to talk to your child’s doctor
If anything about how your toddler plays, talks, moves or responds to you worries you, or she has lost a word or a skill she used to have, talk with your child’s doctor now. Ask for a hearing test first. Changes at home and a professional evaluation work together; neither replaces the other. “Virtual autism” is not a medical diagnosis; if that phrase brought you here, read what it means and how to turn off the TV with a toddler.
Sources: World Health Organization 2019; American Academy of Pediatrics 2016; Yogman et al. 2018; Brushe et al. 2024; Mindell et al. 2015; Montag, Jones and Smith 2015. Full references are in chapters 4, 10, 15 and 16 of Virtual Autism; the sources page lists the key studies behind this site.
Want the full picture? Virtual Autism sets out the research, its limits and a practical plan for home.
General information, not medical advice. If you are worried about your child, talk to your child’s doctor.